I’m seeing quite a few posts from fundamentalist Brexiters at the moment, who seem to be spewing acid from every orifice now that it seems that their wet-dream of a Proud, Independent Britain which wants naught to do with Johnny Foreigner – and his evil, garlic-smelling ways – is fading along with Theresa May’s chances of staying in Number 10. In fact, they’re becoming more strident, ‘doubling-down’ on the jingoism and resentment. So here’s an open letter to said ‘Crusader’ for British Values and British Independence.
To whom it may concern –
I have been made aware of your continuing, and rather immoderate, opposition on social media to anyone who mildly suggests compromising (or ‘back-sliding’ in your terms) on our exit from the EU. There have been numerous posts to this effect since the General Election on June 8th, and it seems that the less-than-rousing support given to the Conservative government therein has roused fear in your patriotic breast that the full-on ‘break-all-the-furniture-and-storm-out’ Hard Brexit which you favoured (for some reason) may no longer be an option. Consequently, your tone has become, shall we say, slightly histrionic and more-than-a-little petulant. I would like, therefore, to address these fears in my own manner.
It’s evident from the barely-literate, aggressively stupid nature of your posts that you are a member of a very, very particular, and exclusive, tribe; that of the bigoted, anti-intellectual white British male who thinks that the country’s swamped with foreigners and their foreign ways, thus preventing him from exercising his god-given superiority over everyone else, everywhere.
This just in, my friend; the fact that you’re British, white and male means precisely fuck-all in the 21st century. The Britain you want to see returned is gone forever (if in fact it ever existed) and the only way this country is going to survive is by teaming up with the Europeans to try and hold our own economically against the circling predators of America and Russia. That’s why Trump and Putin (and the corporate media hatemongers like Murdoch who egg them on) were so eager to see us quit; so they can pick us off at their leisure, while they work to further undermine the EU and divide up the spoils.
But that means nothing to you and your ilk, does it? You’re of the mentality that probably worships the ground on which Trump and Putin shit. They’re STRONG MEN, and that’s the main thing, right?. You probably want a STRONG MAN to run Britain too, to squeee like a fan-girl over, and ‘heil’ until your arm’s too sore for wanking. Then you can pack off all the foreigners (the Muslims especially) back to the other side of Calais, where they belong, so this ‘United Kingdom’ can decay in its own British way into your fantasy land of vicarage cream-tea fascism, where Everyone Knows Their Place In The Scheme Of Things (and we don’t notice the armed, jackbooted police on every street-corner).
So you just carry on spitting bile at your intellectual superiors, matey, and those who care about the Britain we’re bequeathing to our children and grandchildren. If that future does indeed belong to pigshit-thick knobheads like you, I’m advising them to emigrate. To Europe.
Yours affectionately,
Brian.
(PS, give my love to the wife and kids, if you’re allowed to see them at the Refuge)