BRIAN WILLIS is the author of lots of stuff you probably haven’t read (come to think of it, neither has he). In 2000, he edited a book called ‘Hideous Progeny’, which had pieces by real, proper writers whose stuff you might have read (Tim Lebbon, Stephen Volk, and an introduction by Kim Newman, to namedrop just three) and which managed to win a British Fantasy Award, which is very nice even if it does look like a cock on a plinth. He also wrote (with Chris Poote) a novel called ‘Scorpion’, which was praised by Colin Wilson, who’s dead now, so fat lot of good that did anyone.
He grew up in Port Talbot, South Wales, but a few years ago relocated just down the coast to Swansea, which should tell you something about the scale of his ambitions. He has a family who look embarrassed and change the subject when his name is mentioned, and a head that is too large for his body. Or anyone’s body.
His favourite colour is green, his favourite word (based on frequency of usage) is ‘twat’, and his favourite Holy Roman Emperor is Otto III.
If found, please lose again immediately.